From the Author

Monday, March 25, 2019


"The biggest communication problem is we don't listen to understand, we listen to reply."  Southern Recollection/Chris Bush

"The day finally arrived; Forrest Gump dies and goes to Heaven.  He is at the Pearly Gates, met by St. Peter himself.  However, the gates are closed and Forrest approaches the Gatekeeeper.

St. Peter says, "Well, Forrest, it's certainly good to see you. We have heard a lot about you.  I must tell you, though, that the place is filling up fast, and we've been administering an entrance examination for everyone.  The test is short, but you have to pass it before you can get into Heaven."  Forrest responds, "It shor is good to be here, St. Peter, sir.  But nobody ever tolt me about any entrance exam.  Shor hope the test ain't too hard; life was a beg enough test as it was."

St. Peter goes on, "Yes, I know, Forrest, but the test is only three questions.
First:  What two days of the week begin with the letter "T"?
Second: How many seconds are there in a year?
Third: What is God's first name?
Forrest leaves to think the questions over. He returns the next day and sees St. Peter who waves him up and says, "Now that you have had a chance to think the questions over, tell me your answers."

Forrest says, "Well, the first one--which two days in the week begin with the letter "T"? Shucks, that one's easy.  That'd be Today and Tomorrow.

The Saint's eyes open wide and he exclaims, "Forrest, that's not what I was thinking, but you do have a point, and I guess I didn't specify, so I'll give you credit for that answer.  How about the next one?" asks St. Peter.
"How many seconds in a year?" "Now that ones's harder," says Forrest, "but I thunk and thunk about that a nod I guess the only answer can be twelve."  Astounded, St. Peter says, "Twelve? Twelve? Forrest, how in Heaven's name could you come up with twelve seconds in a year?"

Forrest says "Shucks, there's gotta be twelve: January 2nd, February 2nd, March 2nd...."
"Hold it," interrupts St. Peter. "I see where you're going with this, and I see your point, though that wasn't quite what I had in mind.....but I'll have to give you credit for that one, too.  Let's go on with the third and final question.  Can you tell me God's first name"?

"Sure" Forrest replied, "it's Andy." "Andy?!", exclaimed an exasperated and frustrated St. Peter.  "Ok, I can understand how you came up with your answers to my first two questions, but just how in the world did you come up with the name Andy as the first name of God?"
St. Peter opened the Pearly Gates and said: "Run Forrest, run."  Anonymous Internet

Take time to give a word of praise
To one unsure-depressed, 
You may be busy with your life
But others are hard-pressed.
Take time to listen to a friend
Who needs to talk it out,
You may have things to hurry to
But take time to hear them out.
Take time to hear and be aware
Of each one in your home,
Your loved ones are your greatest joy
Take time to let them know.
Take time to love--take time to share
With all you meet each day
Your happy thoughts, your friendly smile,
Take time to love today 


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