"Despair equals suffering without meaning." Victor Frankl from Man's Search For Meaning
Victor was a Jewish survivor from a concentration camp in Germany. He had to find meaning in his life to be able to survive. He found that individuals who felt they had something to give to others were able to overcome indescribable pain and suffering. They were able to make a difference in the lives of their fellow prisoners by offering what they had available; a small morsel of food, a squeeze of the hand, a hug, a smile, a joke, a supportive gaze, music of any kind, emotional support or help with anything else.
"Each person on this planet is here for a purpose...That purpose is to care for other people and to help this world become a better place through service to others." Actor Gary Sinise, Veterans foundation director
"Worry does not take away tomorrow's trouble. It takes away today's peace." Carole Brock of Miami Florida
Instead of worry and despair, try to find someone that you can do something for to make their life easier. It may only be a smile of encouragement but it may make a huge difference for someone who feels isolated and lonely. When we put God and others in our thoughts, there is no room for despair.
I wish you happiness and peace!
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From the Author
Monday, April 8, 2019
Monday, March 25, 2019
Listening
"The biggest communication problem is we don't listen to understand, we listen to reply." Southern Recollection/Chris Bush
"The day finally arrived; Forrest Gump dies and goes to Heaven. He is at the Pearly Gates, met by St. Peter himself. However, the gates are closed and Forrest approaches the Gatekeeeper.
St. Peter says, "Well, Forrest, it's certainly good to see you. We have heard a lot about you. I must tell you, though, that the place is filling up fast, and we've been administering an entrance examination for everyone. The test is short, but you have to pass it before you can get into Heaven." Forrest responds, "It shor is good to be here, St. Peter, sir. But nobody ever tolt me about any entrance exam. Shor hope the test ain't too hard; life was a beg enough test as it was."
St. Peter goes on, "Yes, I know, Forrest, but the test is only three questions.
First: What two days of the week begin with the letter "T"?
Second: How many seconds are there in a year?
Third: What is God's first name?
Forrest leaves to think the questions over. He returns the next day and sees St. Peter who waves him up and says, "Now that you have had a chance to think the questions over, tell me your answers."
Forrest says, "Well, the first one--which two days in the week begin with the letter "T"? Shucks, that one's easy. That'd be Today and Tomorrow.
The Saint's eyes open wide and he exclaims, "Forrest, that's not what I was thinking, but you do have a point, and I guess I didn't specify, so I'll give you credit for that answer. How about the next one?" asks St. Peter.
"How many seconds in a year?" "Now that ones's harder," says Forrest, "but I thunk and thunk about that a nod I guess the only answer can be twelve." Astounded, St. Peter says, "Twelve? Twelve? Forrest, how in Heaven's name could you come up with twelve seconds in a year?"
Forrest says "Shucks, there's gotta be twelve: January 2nd, February 2nd, March 2nd...."
"Hold it," interrupts St. Peter. "I see where you're going with this, and I see your point, though that wasn't quite what I had in mind.....but I'll have to give you credit for that one, too. Let's go on with the third and final question. Can you tell me God's first name"?
"Sure" Forrest replied, "it's Andy." "Andy?!", exclaimed an exasperated and frustrated St. Peter. "Ok, I can understand how you came up with your answers to my first two questions, but just how in the world did you come up with the name Andy as the first name of God?"
"ANDY WALKS WITH ME, ANDY TALKS WITH ME, ANDY TELLS ME I AM HIS OWN..."
St. Peter opened the Pearly Gates and said: "Run Forrest, run." Anonymous Internet
"The day finally arrived; Forrest Gump dies and goes to Heaven. He is at the Pearly Gates, met by St. Peter himself. However, the gates are closed and Forrest approaches the Gatekeeeper.
St. Peter says, "Well, Forrest, it's certainly good to see you. We have heard a lot about you. I must tell you, though, that the place is filling up fast, and we've been administering an entrance examination for everyone. The test is short, but you have to pass it before you can get into Heaven." Forrest responds, "It shor is good to be here, St. Peter, sir. But nobody ever tolt me about any entrance exam. Shor hope the test ain't too hard; life was a beg enough test as it was."
St. Peter goes on, "Yes, I know, Forrest, but the test is only three questions.
First: What two days of the week begin with the letter "T"?
Second: How many seconds are there in a year?
Third: What is God's first name?
Forrest leaves to think the questions over. He returns the next day and sees St. Peter who waves him up and says, "Now that you have had a chance to think the questions over, tell me your answers."
Forrest says, "Well, the first one--which two days in the week begin with the letter "T"? Shucks, that one's easy. That'd be Today and Tomorrow.
The Saint's eyes open wide and he exclaims, "Forrest, that's not what I was thinking, but you do have a point, and I guess I didn't specify, so I'll give you credit for that answer. How about the next one?" asks St. Peter.
"How many seconds in a year?" "Now that ones's harder," says Forrest, "but I thunk and thunk about that a nod I guess the only answer can be twelve." Astounded, St. Peter says, "Twelve? Twelve? Forrest, how in Heaven's name could you come up with twelve seconds in a year?"
Forrest says "Shucks, there's gotta be twelve: January 2nd, February 2nd, March 2nd...."
"Hold it," interrupts St. Peter. "I see where you're going with this, and I see your point, though that wasn't quite what I had in mind.....but I'll have to give you credit for that one, too. Let's go on with the third and final question. Can you tell me God's first name"?
"Sure" Forrest replied, "it's Andy." "Andy?!", exclaimed an exasperated and frustrated St. Peter. "Ok, I can understand how you came up with your answers to my first two questions, but just how in the world did you come up with the name Andy as the first name of God?"
"ANDY WALKS WITH ME, ANDY TALKS WITH ME, ANDY TELLS ME I AM HIS OWN..."
St. Peter opened the Pearly Gates and said: "Run Forrest, run." Anonymous Internet
Take time to give a word of praise
To one unsure-depressed,
You may be busy with your life
But others are hard-pressed.
Take time to listen to a friend
Who needs to talk it out,
You may have things to hurry to
But take time to hear them out.
Take time to hear and be aware
Of each one in your home,
Your loved ones are your greatest joy
Take time to let them know.
Take time to love--take time to share
With all you meet each day
Your happy thoughts, your friendly smile,
Take time to love today
Anonymous
Wednesday, March 13, 2019
The Time is Now
This article was listed by Jeanne Phillips, Dear Abby, as her favorite poem. Its author is unknown.
The Time is Now
If you are ever going to love me,
Love me now, while I can know
The sweet and tender feelings
Which from true affection flow.
Love me now
While I am living.
Do not wait until I am gone
And then have it chiseled in marble,
Sweet words on ice-cold stone.
If you have tender thoughts of me,
Please tell me now.
If you wait until I am sleeping,
Never to awaken,
There will be death between us
And I won't hear you then.
So, if you love me, even a little bit,
Let me know it while I am living
So I can treasure it.
When I saw this article, it reminded me of my dad who was 54 years old when he died suddenly.
I think I thought he would always be there and I saw the large father's day card that I forgot to send to him. I'm sure my dad knew that I loved him but I was busy with my family and didn't tell him often enough in person. Remember that life is fragile and we don't always have another chance to tell our loved ones how we feel about them. Love is a wonderful gift that multiplies when we share it!
Check out my book, e book and audio book, "The Dying Teach Us How to Live" and my art gallery
The Time is Now
If you are ever going to love me,
Love me now, while I can know
The sweet and tender feelings
Which from true affection flow.
Love me now
While I am living.
Do not wait until I am gone
And then have it chiseled in marble,
Sweet words on ice-cold stone.
If you have tender thoughts of me,
Please tell me now.
If you wait until I am sleeping,
Never to awaken,
There will be death between us
And I won't hear you then.
So, if you love me, even a little bit,
Let me know it while I am living
So I can treasure it.
When I saw this article, it reminded me of my dad who was 54 years old when he died suddenly.
I think I thought he would always be there and I saw the large father's day card that I forgot to send to him. I'm sure my dad knew that I loved him but I was busy with my family and didn't tell him often enough in person. Remember that life is fragile and we don't always have another chance to tell our loved ones how we feel about them. Love is a wonderful gift that multiplies when we share it!
Check out my book, e book and audio book, "The Dying Teach Us How to Live" and my art gallery
Wednesday, March 6, 2019
Finding Joy In Just Being Alive
There was a recent article in the Dayton Daily News by Kaitlin Schroeder, "Suicide, depression rates among teenagers on rise". A teen from the area recently died after a suicide attempt. Dr. Greg Raimey, pediatric psychiatrist with Dayton Children's Hospital, said suicide and depression are sensitive topics that can be hard for parents to bring up,.....".
Another article, "Make finding joy in just being alive a goal" by Barton Goldsmith states, "Stuff happens and you have to deal with it or it will deal you out. Life is not a fairy tale, and you cannot expect it to be completely drama-free. That being said, how you deal with the drama is totally up to you."
I think that many modern parents focus on protecting their children from consequences of their own decisions, especially the negative repercussions. Another goal could be educating children about their options, allowing them to make decisions, encouraging them to follow through with goals (positive or negative), and then experiencing the results of their actions. They can give definite rules and concrete, fair and encompassing penalties and rewards. Parents then have the responsibility to step back as their children face and directly deal with outcomes of their decisions. Situations of bullying need to be supervised. Remember, bullies need help also as they have probably been bullied themselves. Children have specialized needs with trauma, death, abuse, crisis at home, family financial distress. However, they also have the ability to be responsible for their own childhood challenges that occur on a daily basis.
Children and teens need to learn by experience that life is not always fair, that bad things happen to good people, and that we have a choice about how we respond to trauma, grief, sadness or emotional, psychological or spiritual pain. Life is never perfect but it can be inspirational, empowering, and exciting as it unfolds.
Actor Luke Perry died recently at age 52. My dad died at age 54. My niece died at 3 months old. Luke was quoted by AP in 2006, "When you are younger you can have only work, and I will for a long time. But it doesn't command my attention anymore. A lot of mysteries and the questions I had about it I've figured out, but life offers up mysteries every day."
Give children tools to face life with courage, flexibility, empowerment, and understanding of consequences of decisions. "Make finding joy in just being alive a goal". Check out my book, e book, audio book, art gallery, vinyl prints "The Dying Teach Us How to Live
Another article, "Make finding joy in just being alive a goal" by Barton Goldsmith states, "Stuff happens and you have to deal with it or it will deal you out. Life is not a fairy tale, and you cannot expect it to be completely drama-free. That being said, how you deal with the drama is totally up to you."
I think that many modern parents focus on protecting their children from consequences of their own decisions, especially the negative repercussions. Another goal could be educating children about their options, allowing them to make decisions, encouraging them to follow through with goals (positive or negative), and then experiencing the results of their actions. They can give definite rules and concrete, fair and encompassing penalties and rewards. Parents then have the responsibility to step back as their children face and directly deal with outcomes of their decisions. Situations of bullying need to be supervised. Remember, bullies need help also as they have probably been bullied themselves. Children have specialized needs with trauma, death, abuse, crisis at home, family financial distress. However, they also have the ability to be responsible for their own childhood challenges that occur on a daily basis.
Children and teens need to learn by experience that life is not always fair, that bad things happen to good people, and that we have a choice about how we respond to trauma, grief, sadness or emotional, psychological or spiritual pain. Life is never perfect but it can be inspirational, empowering, and exciting as it unfolds.
Actor Luke Perry died recently at age 52. My dad died at age 54. My niece died at 3 months old. Luke was quoted by AP in 2006, "When you are younger you can have only work, and I will for a long time. But it doesn't command my attention anymore. A lot of mysteries and the questions I had about it I've figured out, but life offers up mysteries every day."
Give children tools to face life with courage, flexibility, empowerment, and understanding of consequences of decisions. "Make finding joy in just being alive a goal". Check out my book, e book, audio book, art gallery, vinyl prints "The Dying Teach Us How to Live
Tuesday, February 26, 2019
The Optimist
A wonderful lady, Elodie Armstrong, diagnosed with multiple sclerosis wrote her own ten commandments:
Thou shalt not worry, for worry is the most unproductive of all human activities.
Thou shalt not be fearful, for most of the things we fear never come to pass.
Thou shalt not cross bridges before you get to them, for no one yet has succeeded in accomplishing this.
Thou shalt face each problem as it comes. You can handle one at a time anyway.
Thou shalt not take problems to bed with you for they make very poor bedfellows.
Thou shalt not borrow other people's problems. They can take better care of them than you can.
Thou shalt not try to relive yesterday for good or ill--it is gone. Concentrate on what is happening in your life today.
Thou shalt count thy blessings, never overlooking the small ones, for a lot of small blessings add up to a big one.
Thou shalt be a good listener, for only when you listen do you hear ideas different from your own. It's very hard to learn something new when you are talking.
Thou shalt not become bogged down by frustration, for 90 percent of it is rooted in self-pity and it will only interfere with positive action.
Check out my book, e book, audio book "The Dying Teach Us How to Live", my art gallery
Thou shalt not worry, for worry is the most unproductive of all human activities.
Thou shalt not be fearful, for most of the things we fear never come to pass.
Thou shalt not cross bridges before you get to them, for no one yet has succeeded in accomplishing this.
Thou shalt face each problem as it comes. You can handle one at a time anyway.
Thou shalt not take problems to bed with you for they make very poor bedfellows.
Thou shalt not borrow other people's problems. They can take better care of them than you can.
Thou shalt not try to relive yesterday for good or ill--it is gone. Concentrate on what is happening in your life today.
Thou shalt count thy blessings, never overlooking the small ones, for a lot of small blessings add up to a big one.
Thou shalt be a good listener, for only when you listen do you hear ideas different from your own. It's very hard to learn something new when you are talking.
Thou shalt not become bogged down by frustration, for 90 percent of it is rooted in self-pity and it will only interfere with positive action.
Check out my book, e book, audio book "The Dying Teach Us How to Live", my art gallery
Saturday, February 16, 2019
Choices
Recently I heard about a mother and wife who was in a car crash. She did not have sufficient brain activity to maintain life. I know that a sudden life and death situation is very shocking to the point of having difficulty making decisions. In this case, the family were asked about organ donation. I don't know what they chose. It is important that all of us over 18 years old let our family and friends know about our wishes. There are many people on waiting lists for organ donors for lungs, hearts, kidneys, livers, eyes, etc.
This particular woman who was dying was a loving, giving and caring person who may have had donor directives on her driver's license. However, family members can override any of those wishes. If there was a conversation about this issue, family members would not have to wonder what your wishes are. Many lives can be affected for many years ahead as other people fill their lives with hope.
To Remember Me
by Robert N. Test
The day will come when my body will lie upon a white sheet neatly tucked under four corners of a mattress located in a hospital busily occupied with the living and the dying. At a certain moment a doctor will determine that my brain has ceased to function and that, for all intents and purposes, my life has stopped. When that happens, do not attempt to instill artificial life into my body by the use of a machine. And don't call this my deathbed. Let be called the Bed of Life, and let my body be taken from it to help others lead fuller lives.
Give my sight to the man who has never seen a sunrise, a baby's face or love in the eyes of a woman.
Give my heart to a person whose own heart has caused nothing but endless days of pain.
Give my blood to the teenager who was pulled from the wreckage of his car, so that he might live to see his grandchildren play.
Give my kidneys to one who depends on a machine to exist from week to week.
Take my bones, every muscle, every fiber and nerve in my body and find a way to make a crippled child walk.
Explore every corner of my brain. Take my cells, if necessary, and let them grow so that, someday a speechless boy will shout at the crack of a bat and a deaf girl will hear the sound of rain against her window.
Burn what is left of me and scatter the ashes to the winds to help the flowers grow.
If you must bury something, let it be my faults, my weaknesses and all prejudice against my fellow man.
Give my sins to the devil.
Give my soul to God.
If, by chance, you wish to remember me, do it with a kind deed or work to someone who needs you.
If you do all I have asked, I will live forever.
Check out my book, e book and audio book, "The Dying Teach Us How to Live" and my art gallery at illuminangels.com
This particular woman who was dying was a loving, giving and caring person who may have had donor directives on her driver's license. However, family members can override any of those wishes. If there was a conversation about this issue, family members would not have to wonder what your wishes are. Many lives can be affected for many years ahead as other people fill their lives with hope.
To Remember Me
by Robert N. Test
The day will come when my body will lie upon a white sheet neatly tucked under four corners of a mattress located in a hospital busily occupied with the living and the dying. At a certain moment a doctor will determine that my brain has ceased to function and that, for all intents and purposes, my life has stopped. When that happens, do not attempt to instill artificial life into my body by the use of a machine. And don't call this my deathbed. Let be called the Bed of Life, and let my body be taken from it to help others lead fuller lives.
Give my sight to the man who has never seen a sunrise, a baby's face or love in the eyes of a woman.
Give my heart to a person whose own heart has caused nothing but endless days of pain.
Give my blood to the teenager who was pulled from the wreckage of his car, so that he might live to see his grandchildren play.
Give my kidneys to one who depends on a machine to exist from week to week.
Take my bones, every muscle, every fiber and nerve in my body and find a way to make a crippled child walk.
Explore every corner of my brain. Take my cells, if necessary, and let them grow so that, someday a speechless boy will shout at the crack of a bat and a deaf girl will hear the sound of rain against her window.
Burn what is left of me and scatter the ashes to the winds to help the flowers grow.
If you must bury something, let it be my faults, my weaknesses and all prejudice against my fellow man.
Give my sins to the devil.
Give my soul to God.
If, by chance, you wish to remember me, do it with a kind deed or work to someone who needs you.
If you do all I have asked, I will live forever.
Check out my book, e book and audio book, "The Dying Teach Us How to Live" and my art gallery at illuminangels.com
Tuesday, February 5, 2019
The Yellow Roses
"I walked into the grocery store not particularly interested in buying groceries. I wasn't hungry. The pain of losing my husband of 37 years was still too raw. And this grocery store held so many sweet memories. Rudy often came with me and almost every time he'd pretend to go off and look for something special. I knew what he was up to. I'd always spot him walking down the aisle with the three yellow roses in his hands. Rudy knew I loved yellow roses. With a heart filled with grief, I only wanted to bury my few items and leave, but even grocery shopping was different since Rudy passed on. Shopping for one took time, a little more thought than it had for two. Standing by the meat, I searched for the perfect small steak and remembered how Rudy had loved his steak. Suddenly a woman came beside me. She was blonde, slim and lovely in a soft green pantsuit. I watched as she picked up a large pack of T-bones, dropped them in her basket, hesitated, and then put them back. She turned to go and once again reached for the pack of steaks. She saw me watching her and she smiled. "My husband loves T-bones, but honestly, at these prices, I don't know.' I swelled the emotion down my throat and met her pale blue eyes. " My husband passed away eight days ago,' I told her. Glancing at the package in her hands, I fought to control the tremble in my voice. 'Buy him the steaks. And cherish every moment you have together.' She shook her head and I saw the emotion in her eyes as she placed the package in her basket and wheeled away.
I turned and pushed my cart across the length of the store to the dairy products. There I stood, trying to decide which size milk I should buy. Quart, I finally decided and moved on to the ice cream section near the front of the store. I placed the ice cream in my cart and looked down the aisle toward the front. I saw first the green suit, then recognized the pretty lady coming towards me. In her arms she carried a package. On her face was the brightest smile I had ever seen. I would swear a soft halo encircled her blonde hair as she kept walking toward me, her eyes holding mine. As she came closer, I saw what she held and tears began misting in my eyes. 'These are for you, ' she said and placed three beautiful long stemmed yellow roses in my arms. 'When you go through the line, they will know these are paid for.' She leaned over and placed a gentle kiss on my cheek, then smiled again.
I wanted to tell her what she'd done, what the roses meant, but still unable to speak. I watched as she walked away as tears clouded my vision. I looked down at the beautiful roses nestled in the green tissue wrapping and found it almost unreal. How did she know? Suddenly the answer seemed so clear. I wasn't alone. 'Oh, Rudy, you haven't forgotten me, have you? I whispered, with tears in my eyes. He was still with me and she was his angel." Anonymous Internet
Remember to look around at the people you see and don't be afraid to reach out to someone who appears to be sad or grieving. We can be angels to each other, earth angels. I'm sending you a hug!
Check out my art gallery, e book, audio book and published book, "The Dying Teach Us How to Live"
I turned and pushed my cart across the length of the store to the dairy products. There I stood, trying to decide which size milk I should buy. Quart, I finally decided and moved on to the ice cream section near the front of the store. I placed the ice cream in my cart and looked down the aisle toward the front. I saw first the green suit, then recognized the pretty lady coming towards me. In her arms she carried a package. On her face was the brightest smile I had ever seen. I would swear a soft halo encircled her blonde hair as she kept walking toward me, her eyes holding mine. As she came closer, I saw what she held and tears began misting in my eyes. 'These are for you, ' she said and placed three beautiful long stemmed yellow roses in my arms. 'When you go through the line, they will know these are paid for.' She leaned over and placed a gentle kiss on my cheek, then smiled again.
I wanted to tell her what she'd done, what the roses meant, but still unable to speak. I watched as she walked away as tears clouded my vision. I looked down at the beautiful roses nestled in the green tissue wrapping and found it almost unreal. How did she know? Suddenly the answer seemed so clear. I wasn't alone. 'Oh, Rudy, you haven't forgotten me, have you? I whispered, with tears in my eyes. He was still with me and she was his angel." Anonymous Internet
Remember to look around at the people you see and don't be afraid to reach out to someone who appears to be sad or grieving. We can be angels to each other, earth angels. I'm sending you a hug!
Check out my art gallery, e book, audio book and published book, "The Dying Teach Us How to Live"
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